Baby hungry? More like, infant hungry.

Dear Ash,

You have a new baby cousin. He's only three days old and let me tell you, he is adorable.

I can't get enough of holding him, even when you protest (sorry, not sorry). He is just tiny, tiny, tiny. He has tiny little arms and legs, little bitty fingers and toes, and the cutest mop of dark hair on top of his head.

It has me baby hungry. Even though logistically (and pretty much every way except emotionally), we're not ready for a new baby, I sure wish we were. There is something so special about new babies.

This morning, you slept later than I wanted you to (a rare occurrence) and I went in to wake you up. I took one look at you and knew I just couldn't do it. So instead, I sat down on the couch and watched you breathe and squirm and--when you finally were waking up--stretch. I thought I would just die, you were that cute.

But as I sat there on that couch, I couldn't get over how big you looked. And it broke my heart.

I remember when you were so tiny, you barely fit in your car seat.

I remember when newborn diapers looked huge on you.

I remember the first time I put you in your crib for a nap, I almost couldn't bring myself to leave you there because of how small you looked.

Now, you've almost outgrown your car seat, you wear size three diapers and they definitely don't look small on you, and you stand up at the side of your crib calling for me when you wake up.

How do moms deal with their babies growing up? I'd really like to know the secret, because I feel like you are growing up way too quickly.

Please stay little forever.

Love,
Mom

A my-baby-is-almost-9-months-old update.

Dear Ash,

It's been forever since I've written. Isn't funny how, when life is the busiest (meaning you'd have the most to write), you have the least amount of time to actually write it down.

Since I've last written, we have moved and unpacked twice. I had my big dance performance. Your father quit his job, began working for himself, and launched a big online course. You have started crawling, climbing, standing, cruising, and almost walking.

We took you to the beach and you loved it. You walked (holding my fingers for balance) right into the water and plopped down. You were crawling all over, taking handfuls of sand and shoving them into your mouth as fast as you could. When we were on the boat, you would turn your face towards the wind, squint your eyes, and grin. You love the water so much.

You still don't sleep the full eleven hours at night that you are supposed to without waking up, but you do pretty good. You usually wake up between 5:45 and 6:30 still, but you almost always go back to sleep and sleep until 7:30 or 8. It's nice, but I'm hoping you learn to sleep through the night without waking up at all soon.

You have such a cute little personality and it's still growing. You laugh all the time and love getting attention from people as long as I'm holding you. If anyone else tries to take you, you scream. Certain people--namely, your grandmothers, your aunt Melissa, and of course your father--are acceptable to you (especially if I'm not around!). You love water, ice cream (healthy, of course), nursing, wearing only your diaper, getting out of the car, and new toys. Your favorite toys are things that aren't meant to be toys, like the lids to candles.

I sure love you. You are so cute and so lovable. I am so grateful you are my baby girl.

Now if only I could get you to stop growing up so fast!

Love,
Mom