Why we decided to do a home birth this time around.

Dear Ash,

As I get further in my pregnancy, the fact that we're adding a second child to our family is getting more and more real. I think you're excited too (I know you don't actually understand, but it's still fun). I have you trained to pat my belly and say, "Baby, baby".

Last night, I finally started practicing Hypnobabies. As I've been reading through the book and listening to the first track, I have been thinking a lot about the way I've decided to do this birth.

With you, we went through a birthing center. I loosely followed a program my sister-in-law's midwife put together and sort of practiced the Hypnobabies in preparation for an epidural-free birth. While I love that you were born and wouldn't change anything about it now, Ben and I were not impressed at all with the birthing center and the way they handled both the prenatal care and the birth. We would not go through them again and would not recommend anyone to their facility. I also wished, especially during labor, that I had been more faithful with the diet I had been on and with practicing Hypnobabies.

I left the birthing center sure that for the next pregnancy, I'd be going to a hospital.

But, here I am. Practicing Hypnobabies. Meeting with a midwife, planning on a home birth. Following (much more strictly) the same diet and program I was following before.

I know that a lot of the stuff I am doing, people think it's crazy. Why not just do it in a hospital, get an epidural? This time around (having already given birth once),  I understand why women love epidurals. I know why some think it's crazy to go without one when you don't have to.

I think it's a really personal decision, that comes from your situation, your beliefs, your lifestyle, and what you feel directed to do. I also believe the Lord plays a huge part in how you nurture your children, from the time they are in the womb, continuing through their birth and on throughout the rest of their lives. This includes things like, hospital or at home, epidural or "natural".

For me, I have a low risk pregnancy. Because of that, I know home birth is best for me this time around. I know there are benefits for both baby and mother that come from declining an epidural and other interventions. I also know that low risk pregnancies are less likely to need to receive interventions in the comfort and safety of their own home rather than in a strange hospital.

The biggest factor that has influenced my decision is the midwife I am going through. Her name is Donna and if I hadn't found her (or someone like her), I would be going to a hospital. Even just the first meeting with her, I went from being very nervous about natural birth to completely confident in how this next birth will go. It was night and day from my experience with the birthing center.

Everything about prenatal care, with Donna, is helping prepare for the birth. From what you eat or don't eat to the supplements she has you take and when to different exercises she has you doing, she prepares your body for the easiest, shortest, and most painless birth possible. And during the birth, she helps you create the best atmosphere and is there the entire time, making sure things are going the way they need to, monitoring everything she needs to, and making sure your body is ready for the baby to come out.

For Donna, birth isn't something that happens. She makes it happen. She is so experienced, I know I am in safe hands. We've already had in depth discussions about exactly what will happen during the birth and what roles each person will play, what would constitute a transfer to the hospital, and what would happen if we did transfer. She is so concerned that both Ben and I are involved in the pregnancy and birthing process and always wants to know any concerns or questions we have. One day, she woke up thinking about me and called to make sure I was feeling alright, just because she cares so much.

You just wouldn't get that kind of support from a doctor in a hospital.

I love the feeling of 24 hour support and help that I get from Donna. I love the confidence that comes from knowing if I have a problem any time throughout this process, I can go to her and she will know what to do about it. I love that I can have the kind of birth that I want to have, without needing to worry that a hospital staff member will do something I don't want them to. And I love that there are things that I can do to help the birth go smoothly.

That's why I feel a home birth is best for us, this time around.

Love,
Mom

Christmas for a 1-year-old should be easier than this.

Dear Ash,

We thought this year, Christmas would be easy. You're only one, so it should be easy not to spoil you. I mean, honestly, you love everything. We could wrap up an empty box or plastic cups from the dollar store and you'd think it was the greatest thing ever.

But, you love everything.

You love animals. You love dogs and cats and owls. You love stuffed bears and all the noises animals make.

You love belly buttons. And I mean, love, belly buttons. And other body parts. Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes is one of your favorite songs. You love noses and ears and hair. You love to find eyes especially.

You love music. And dancing. And anything that makes noise.

You love books. You love baby dolls. You love barbies and toy cars and blocks and sunglasses. You love blankets and pillows and puzzle type toys.

You seriously love everything, so it's hard not to just get you everything.

We've already gotten your gifts and wrapped them, plus all the stocking stuffers for your stocking. And I'm so excited for you to open them all!

Now, I just have to wait five more days. And keep myself from buying more toys for you.

Love,
Mom